Hey,
I know it's been a while since I've posted and most of my last posts were about medical cannabis. I've shifted my attention from Seduction Community stuff to medical marijuana community stuff. But this was too good not to blog about.
At this point I don't know if anyone will ever see it but I have to get it off my proverbial chest. I did a similar blog about this topic here. And sorta touched on the same thing here
Below is a facebook email I received from a guy I've maybe spent 2 minutes talking to face-to-face. We go to the same school and I've seen him around:
Subject: Hi
How are you today [Omitted my real name]? I always find you very attractive and beautiful. You are a very brilliant, smart, and intelligent woman. I am honored to have the opportunity to know you and it would a great prestige for me to get to know you even better. In other words, at the personal level. Life is short and I believe that we should enjoy it to the fullest. My beginning of having that life is by having a cup of coffee with you in Starbucks and just have a casual and friendly talk for 20 minutes of your time. If you are interested, call me at [Omitted his first phone #] or [Omitted his second phone #]. You may email me your time availability at [omitted his email address] and then I promise you I will get back to you [omitted my real name].
I will be happy which whatever decision that you make because I honor your sincerity and authenticity.
With love,
[omitted his name]
Let me break it down how wrong this email is, step-by-step.
Subject: Hi
How are you today [Omitted my real name]?
There's nothing inherently wrong with this.
I always find you very attractive and beautiful.
Mistake #1: Lowered his own value. I know this simple sentence may seem harmless enough to a guy who has no clue what he's doing with women but let me explain how this is a super big no-no.
Let's just pretend for a moment that I felt his value and my value were the exact same before I received this email. Let's say I feel we're both 7's. With this one sentence he loses 2 value points and I gain 2 because he said "attractive and beautiful" I get a point for each of those words and he loses a point for each.
Leaving me at a value of 9 and him at a value of 5. A 9 would never date a 5.
Now, I know there are some dumb fools out their protesting, "But 'attractive and beautiful' are compliments. You should be flattered". I'm attractive and beautiful and I get told so on a regular basis. There is nothing flattering about being told so by a complete stranger.
To be told so by someone I've had maybe 5 words with means one thing. He wants to have sex with me. It also implies that he probably doesn't have anyone who is "attractive and beautiful" to currently have sex with him. So why on earth, if other attractive and beautiful women don't spend their time with this guy, would I?
Reminder: one of the attraction switches is "desired by other women". If a guy can't demonstrate he has other women attracted to him, it's one less thing for me to find attractive about him.
In other words, he has unintentionally demonstrated that he has no attractive and beautiful women in his life which lowers his value below a 5 and I still consider myself a 9 in this situation.
I should note that this would be considered a compliment if we had known each other, I found him attractive, I felt comfortable with him and we had some level of seduction going on. It's not the words themselves but the timing and the delivery which ruined it for this guy.
And that's only the second sentence of the email he sent.
You are a very brilliant, smart, and intelligent woman.
There's no doubt that I am all these things. But if I have never spoken to this guy for more than 2 minutes, how the hell would he know? I don't feel he has had enough time with me to qualify this compliment which to me means, he could easily say it to any woman, making it insincere.
Besides, he said the same thing 3 different ways. "brilliant, smart, and intelligent" all mean the same exact thing. So, that means he's laying it on thick and if he's laying it on thick, something's not right.
It also subcommunicates to me that he doesn't have brilliant, smart, and intelligent women in his life. And again, makes me question why I would want to waste my time with him. He loses 3 value points for (1 for each compliment) and I gain 3. Making his value is at 2 and he's put my value so high, at this point, it doesn't even register on a scale (which I know is absurd...I could easily see myself at a 7 or 9 in different situations but never over a 10).
Again, this would be a compliment coming from a guy at the right time and place.
I am honored to have the opportunity to know you and it would a great prestige for me to get to know you even better.
Syntaxually, This may sound a little odd because I'm pretty sure he is a foreigner.
Other than his foreign sentence structure, this sentence is just over the top. "honored to have the opportunity to know you" Now, mind you, in my mind he is a perfect stranger for him to feel "honored" and "prestiged" to get to know me places me on a super high pedestal at the same time it digs him into a "DLV" ditch. Putting our values astronomically apart. From my calculations he has me somewhere around a 15 and he's put himself at a 0.
At this point, he doesn't have a snow-ball's-chance-in-hell with me. He's made himself so unattractive to me and I feel so uncomfortable about the whole thing. And that's not even half way through the email for Christ's sake.
In other words, at the personal level.
In other words, he wants to fuck me which is out of the question since his value is so much lower than mine now.
Life is short and I believe that we should enjoy it to the fullest.
In other words, he's been unable to get any other girl to fuck him currently and he's fully desperate to be laid by any girl who he finds attractive.
My beginning of having that life is by having a cup of coffee with you in Starbucks and just have a casual and friendly talk for 20 minutes of your time.
Nothing about this email makes me think spending 20 minutes with this guy will be "casual and friendly". In fact, I dread the thought of wasting 20 minutes with this guy because I'll have to sit through 20 minutes of what will doubtlessly be a very socially uncomfortable time with a very unattractive man who does NOT have a clue about how to be successful with women. And he already has indicated that those 20 minutes are going to be the beginning of his life, as if it depends on me having coffee with him. And I don't even drink coffee.
If you are interested, call me at [Omitted his first phone #] or [Omitted his second phone #].
In other words, he's going to eagerly await my call because he has nothing better to do which makes him even more unattractive and makes me feel even more uncomfortable.
You may email me your time availability at [omitted his email address] and then I promise you I will get back to you [omitted my real name].
At this point the email is just painful. I won't continue to deconstruct his words because I think you get the point.
He has caused more alarming questions than anything: Where's the challenge? I don't feel like I've earned this sort of expression. How does he add value to my life? I'd be embarrassed to be seen with a guy who doesn't know how to act socially with women. What if he makes my girlfriends as uncomfortable as he made me?
A girl may not consciously be thinking these things but she will be feeling it on some subconscious level and that's why he's in this position now because he hasn't learned how to interact with women in ways they respond to.
He chose to "frame" it with me on the pedestal and him in the "DLV" ditch but he could have also chosen to "frame" it with himself slightly above me and he could have gamed it all the way. You can lead a horse to water but...you can't make him seduce women successfully; he has to do that himself.
And even if the girl is conscious of exactly everything I've written, she's not going to tell him.
She's going to do 1 of 2 things. 1) ignore the email and the man as much as possible and dread running into him in person. 2) be rude and bitchy towards him so that he gets a clue he doesn't have a chance with her.
I tend to do #1 unless pursued then I won't hesitate to do #2. I've ignored his email so far and really dread running into him in real life. I don't want to hurt his feelings but at the same time, and even more so,I don't want to feel uncomfortable or be pursued by unattractive men.
I'm tempted to send him a link to Love Systems or to write back and tell him how wrong his email is but that hasn't been very productive in the past. Some guys just refuse to learn what it takes to be successful with women.
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