In the Grand Fashion of this blog; more randomness

I Love He Who is Him (or Him Who is He)

I really don't want to say a whole lot about this right now but I will later when I have more time and energy to construct the right combination of words to express what I truly mean by those words.

With that being said, let the radio show begin. Welcome all.

I've got so much to say and not nearly enough time or energy to say it all...or to type out correctly (error free). So, what you get is what you get, for now. I'll clean it all up as soon as I get a moment to breathe. I can only physically move so fast. My mind seems to race off faster than I can keep up with it. And I am easily distractable. It's really not funny either. My mind works weirdly, especially my memories.

I came into class earlier in this quarter and the professor said "I missed you this morning at 9am". I looked puzzled and said "Really?" "You were supposed to meet at 9 this morning to go over your paper." Puzzlement quickly shifted to confusion. "I was?" He barked back "That's what I had written on your paper."

I honestly have no recollection of making a 9 o'clock appointment with my professor. This really tripped me out because it's not the first time someone has told me I have said or did something or they saw me somewhere, when I have no memory of it. And then after they tell me all about it. I think about and I think about and then I think I start to remember and I have idea if I am remembering or just imagining it based off what they told me happened. It's really disorientating sometimes. It's like I don't know which way is up or right.

I had a girl tell me that she had a picture of me and her and another guy together at an event we were at. I told her I didn't remember taking a photo with her all night. She sent me the electronic version of the photos and I swear, it's not me. I even asked my friends. I really that I don't look at myself all day long. I look at other people all day long and other people look at me all day long. But I know I know what I look like in a god damn photograph. I've had professional pictures taken and I've seen myself on film enough times to know what I look like and I did not take a photo with that girl.

So if you think that text message "I just saw your twin" is a jealousy ploy it's not. If you saw a girl that look just like me, I would tell you to go and talk to her and tell me if she's anything like me and if she was, I'd ask you to bring her home. I want to know what a girl like me looks like. I wanna know how she acts. I want know how she thinks. I want pet her and play with her. And tell her stories. But the thing is, she doesn't exist.

But that wasn't what I was getting at. I was talking about memory. Memory is weird. The brain and all it's programming and biological technologies overwhelm me.

There's a reason why humans only use less than 10% of their brain (or what ever the statistic is). It's because the human brain is so powerful that humans can not handle it's full potential. We can barely handle the little we're utilizing.

I had a great day today. One of those days were something internal clicks and you feel like you've been given another piece of the puzzle. One of those days you feel on top of the world as if you can make a difference. One of those days when you're filled with hope so bright it glows strongly from your chest. One of those days when you remember your goals are to leave this place better than you found it. One of those days your heart feels bigger than any ego you've ever encountered and the day is perfect but it's one of those days that a tragedy would have to drag you out of the clouds. You know, one of those days you feel connected to every great person you ever knew, loved, or who lived. I know you know what I am writing about. I feel this way every so often. And I know if I feel it you feel it too. It's not something we talk about often. But we're all capable of it and know I am not the only one that feels this way.

I want to learn to set goals and follow through because I am going to change the world for a collective betterment. And I am going to need so help. Is anyone with me?

There's so much I want to type but I am tired...feeling this passionately can be draining. And I have a cold. I am just lucky I got out bed today. I hope I don't lose my inspiration in the night.

If you're sleeping next to the one you love, may they find their way into your arms soon enough. Goodnight.

Unedited